Dune: The Sisterhood Coming From WarnerMedia

Warner Brothers streaming service is developing a series based off of the Dune novels. The series entitled: Dune: The Sisterhood will focus on a matriarchal order called the Bene Gesserit who have trained themselves through years of physical and mental conditioning to obtain superhuman powers and abilities. They serve as a social, religious, and political force in the Dune universe. Denis Villeneuve (Blade Runner, 2049) will direct and Jon Spaihts will write.

“The Bene Gesserit have always been fascinating to me, Focusing a series around that powerful order of women seemed not only relevant and inspiring but a dynamic setting for the television series.”

— Denis Villeneuve

Another streaming platform and another poor reason to adapt something. “Relevant” Denis Villeneuve says. I wonder what makes telling a story about the Bene Gesserit relevant now. Would it not have been relevant in 2005? Would it not have been relevant in 1995? I think we know what Mr. Villeneuve means by relevant. And it’s precisely why I’m going to avoid this particular project. One streaming service too many, one agenda too many.

Netflix Set To Butcher Tom Clancy’s The Division

For The Division gamers out there…I apologize for bringing this news. Netflix has obtained the rights to produce a film based off of the popular Ubisoft game. It will star Jake Gyllenhaal and Jessica Chastain (who just finished stinking up the screen in the woefully misguided Dark Phoenix). The online-only, role-playing game has over 20 million players and the sequel The Division 2 was just released in March. The screenplay will be adapted by Rafe Judkins (who is developing The Wheel of Time series for Amazon and ugh…also worked on Agents of Shield).

Sorry..I have to take a break…Wheel of Time is one of my favorite fantasy series in the whole world and if this ginger ruins I just might have to track him down. Okay on with the news..

The Division takes place in a future New York after a viral pandemic. The player in the game must rebuild operations in Manhattan, find out about the nature of the outbreak, and address the criminal activity that occurs as a result.

Let’s address the elephant in the room. Netflix adaptations are trash. Their track record is nothing short of abysmal. At this point the odds of this being any good are roughly 20%. Sorry, Division fans, this is a tough break. Umm…I shudder to think what they are going to squirt out of their orifice concerning this one. It will probably look worse than those malformed Ripley clones in Alien Resurrection.

This is what adaptations look like after Netflix is finished with them

The Nightmare Gallery Trailer

If anyone wondered what happened to Amber Benson (of Buffy the Vampire Slayer fame) I found her! She’s over here! In The Nightmare Gallery Amber plays an anthropology professor who becomes obsessed with a paranormal mystery that threatens her job, marriage, and sanity.

Oh dear. That’s unfortunate. When an actor/actress is filming a horrible movie do they realize they are filming a horrible movie? I suppose this is along the lines of ‘do crazy people know they are crazy’? I’m hoping the answer to both is no…because if not, that has to suck, bigly.